You may have heard your daughter say, “Math is not my subject” or “Boys are better at this.” Sometimes she says it lightly, sometimes with real frustration after struggling with a problem. As a parent, your heart sinks. You know she’s capable, but you also know how deeply such beliefs can stick.
In India, this myth—that girls are somehow not “math people”—still lingers quietly in classrooms, families, and even among teachers. The truth is, girls are just as capable as boys in mathematics. What holds them back is not ability but confidence, social conditioning, and subtle cues from the environment.
“Children believe what they hear about themselves. If a girl is told often enough that math is not for her, she may stop trying long before she stops being capable.”
So, how can you help as a parent?
1. Watch Your Words—and Theirs
Be mindful of how math is spoken about at home. Even casual jokes like “I was never good at math” can reinforce the idea that struggling with numbers is natural for girls. Instead, emphasize effort: “Math takes practice, just like learning to ride a cycle.” Encourage her to talk about where she finds difficulty, and treat mistakes as stepping stones, not proof of incapability.
2. Share Role Models She Can See
Representation matters. Point out women mathematicians and scientists—Shakuntala Devi, Anandibai Joshi, or even contemporary IIT graduates she can relate to. Show her that women have been trailblazers in math and STEM. Even better, if she has an older cousin, sibling, or family friend excelling in math, create opportunities for her to interact with them. Real stories make abstract possibilities feel attainable.
3. Encourage Conceptual Learning, Not Just Marks
One reason children lose confidence in math is the focus on exams. Girls, in particular, may internalize a low score as a reflection of their intelligence. Remind her that math is not about speed or marks alone—it is about reasoning, puzzles, and problem-solving. Give her opportunities to enjoy math outside textbooks: Sudoku, logic games, even measuring ingredients while cooking. These experiences normalize math as a part of life, not just a subject.
A student of mine, a bright girl from Class 9, once struggled with algebra. After two low test scores, she declared, “I’m just not a math person.” Instead of drilling more equations, I worked with her on math puzzles and encouraged her to explain her reasoning aloud. Gradually, she began to see patterns and grew more confident. The same girl later participated in math Olympiad practice, surprising even herself. The turning point wasn’t brilliance—it was confidence rebuilt step by step.
4. Challenge the “boys are better” myth directly
If your daughter says, “But all the toppers are boys,” don’t dismiss it. Acknowledge her observation but reframe it: “That may be what you see right now, but that doesn’t mean girls can’t be the best. It just means many give up too early. You don’t have to.” Challenge stereotypes with gentle but firm counterexamples.
“Confidence in math is built not by proving brilliance but by refusing to give up at the first hurdle.”
5. Celebrate Effort, Not Just Correct Answers
Children thrive on validation. If you only celebrate the perfect score, she will fear mistakes. Instead, praise persistence: “I like how you tried this problem three different ways.” This builds resilience. When effort is valued, fear reduces, and curiosity returns.
As a parent, your role is not to turn every child into a math genius but to ensure your daughter never believes math is closed off to her because of gender.
Every time you reassure her, every time you show her women who excel, every time you value her persistence, you chip away at the myth. And one day, when she solves a difficult problem on her own, the look on her face will say it all: “Math is mine too.”